Hi Honeys
How are you today? I'm actually starting to feel a little bit more like me 😊 For the past few weeks I've been (as any spoonie will understand) feeling very "off." I've been very drained, putting up with too many headaches and letting the arthritis win the battle and that's just not good enough dear ones.
If anyone ever finds a way to store up energy to better cope when one of those "flares" hits, I hope it's yelled from the rooftops honeys, so we can all know about it. Doctor's all seem to think (at least all of the ones I've seen over the past twenty years or so) the worst part of living with a chronic illness is coping with the pain.
Thing is, it's just not. At least not in my experience anyway. We all get used to the pain. We don't have a choice really, do we? It becomes a part of our day to day lives. Just like the smile we wear to stop the world's gaze from stopping too long on us.. "move along, smiley person here.. nothing to see.. off you go world..." No one wants to be pitied. Not ever.
No dear ones, the worst part of living with a chronic illness, in my humble opinion, is the loss of everything we always took for granted. Being able to do anything we wanted, when we wanted to do it. The complete lack of energy is the real chronic pest. Having to choose too carefully the activities of the day because you know you're starting off with half drained body batteries.
Add an unhealthy dose of anxiety when faced with the outside world into the mix and well... life gets kinda sucky honeys. The reason I'm telling you all of this is so that you'll better understand why it took me until last Thursday to be able to travel the mile or so to the hairdresser to have my hair cut.
I'd planned to go on Monday morning but, long story short, I felt utterly hellish and simply didn't have the energy. By Wednesday night I was starting to feel a little better and by Thursday morning I thought OK, it's now or never! Phone a taxi and let's get to the hairdressers.
Why the urgency for a hair do? Well at work honeys I have to pin it up, my hair is very heavy, very thick and gives me headaches when it's pulled back and pinned up never mind my poor shoulders having to wrangle it into various clips & pins. So, I broke my own unwritten rule about Thursdays. I never, ever go out on Thursdays. Don't do it. I have to work two long, tiring shifts on Friday & Saturday so I need to be quite miserly with my poor wee body battery on the day before them.
Needs must though so off I went into a taxi and off to see the sweetest hair stylist in the world, dear Julie, who knows exactly how to cut my hair when I get fed up pinning it (I'm not a fan of short hair and always let it grow back till I simply can't pin it up any more.... Julie understands) Saw Julie, chatted, had hair snipped (looks fab, thank you Julie x)
Then decided I'd have a wander around a shop or two since I was there...
I may not have bought very much on Thursday but what I did buy made me smile honeys 😊 Should I share? OK then, why not grab a coffee? See you in a few minutes....
Back again? Cool 😊 Do you remember the fleece throw that Hubby bought me as a surprise gift? It has a Harry Potter Gryffindor design and looks like this...
Well, there I was wandering around Primark for no other reason than that I hadn't been in for such a long time and there it was.... the throw I'd wanted since I'd spotted it on the Primark website! I don't mind admitting I actually squealed in the shop (must stop doing that... people stare!)
The Slytherin House throw! Yaaaay! Daft thing to be happy about but it made me smile from ear to ear and isn't it just positively gorgeous? Why the excitement over a throw? Why Slytherin? Well, dear ones, I only went to see the first Harry Potter movie, as I did so many other movies, because the wonderful, incredible, fabulous Alan Rickman was in the cast. He played, no he brought Professor Severus Snape to life. Professor Snape was, of course, the Head of Slytherin House.
Pottermore may have sorted me into Gryffindor but my heart belongs in Slytherin 😊 So, yes, it might seem silly but I was so happy to find this little throw 😊 Speaking of happiness....
In Primark was a sale rail. On the sale rail was this little vest...
It's Dory! OK, Anyone else love the movie Finding Nemo just too much for words? I swear if I were a character in that movie it would be Dory 😊 So this little vest was coming home with me... was it my size? Yes! Wait... it's how much? £2! yaaayyy! It was a win win, even if it didn't fit (it does) I would have just made it into a cushion and it would still make me smile every time I looked at it 😊
It wasn't till I got it home that I noticed a couple of other things about this sweet little vest. There is a band sewn into the neckline honeys and on that neckband it says...
"99 problems I can't remember!" This vest was meant for me! I mean, it's talking about me, right? Yep. I can get up from the sofa, walk to the kitchen and by the time I get there I've completely forgotten why I went there or what I was going to do when I got there. Maybe I'm a human Dory 😊
Another little smile was hidden on the side of the vest, down near the hem....
It's a tiny, perfect, double sided fabric Dory, peeping out from the side seam near the hem. How adorable is that honeys? A perfectly perfect finishing touch 😊 Well done Primark! While there I also bought a pair of cropped leggings/yoga pants in grey to match the Dory vest, this can now be a "smile while I do housework and/or laundry" outfit 😊
OK, I'll get it if you don't understand my happiness or (in the case of this next item anyway) bottomless well of joy over the last two things I bought because.... well it's a Rosie thing and I'm odd but enough to say, as happy as I was to find the Slytherin throw and the little Dory vest, I was just as happy to find these...
I'd popped into Wilko because, like Primark, it had been ages since I'd been there and what do I leave with but a mega box of citrus scented anti bacterial wipes! The joy! What? I told you I'm odd 😊
Seriously though, I do love my anti bac wipes. I carry a small pack in my handbag, a bottle of anti bac gel goes everywhere with me at work and these wipes smell divine by the way, being lemon & mandarin scented. Like I said honeys, the joy! 😊 I was also stunned to learn that a box of 240 wipes was only £2.50! Take my money! Can I buy in bulk? 😊
OK, last but not least is this.....
Who knew these existed? Such a simple idea and if they'll prevent even a fraction of the wee ouchies I get when using our oven I'm already a fan 😊 It's basically two pieces of silicone, with a cut running the length of one side so they can be slotted onto the front of the shelves of the oven, guarding against (too many) accidental burns. Genius!
That's it honeys. My mini shopping spree. Not very exciting I suppose but it made me smile and it was lovely to be out for an hour or two. I've gotten too accustomed to being such an awesome hermit. I need to work on this before that sneaky invisible force field appears over our front door again. If you've never battled anxiety dear ones, I wish and pray that you never do and if you have, you'll understand and I wish for you strength, courage, countless reasons to go out and I'm sending you a mountain of hugs xx
What have you been up to recently honeys? What's been making you smile? Till next time dear ones, smile often and never be too busy to hug someone, huggles always xx
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