Blogtober day 12: Where are you happiest honeys?

 Hi Honeys, 

How are you today?  It's day 12 of Blogtober, almost halfway through the month!  Our furbaby Jade and I have been busy.  We did a little decluttering and caught up on laundry while waiting for Hubby to get home from work.         

Tonight we made cauliflower cheese for dinner.  We're moving to warmer dishes in our dinner rotation, it's time for warming soups and huge pots of stovies on the stove .  The central heating is on, winter woollies, like jumpers and cardigans, are already in use, with scarves and hats and gloves soon to follow.... if it ever gets safe enough again to be outside for shielding spoonies like me. In the mean time, I'll just pester Hubby to wear his 💕

It might be because I've been home since the original lock down in March but I really am starting to get the feeling that I might never leave our home again.  Amazingly enough, the thought of being at home for the foreseeable future doesn't phase me. At all, actually.  Not even a little bit. I think I'm ok with it. 

The truth is that our home really is where I'm happiest and, much as I do genuinely love my job, I never feel completely at peace when I'm not here.  Home is where I'm happiest, it's where my darling Hubby is and our furbaby of course. It's where I can be just me.

Whenever I've been out in the world, whether at work or an appointment at our doctors surgery (pretty much the only places I've gone for the past couple of years sadly) the second I step into our home and the front door closes behind me, I can feel my shoulders relax. I feel at peace, I'm home💖  

As fellow Spoonies will know, when living with a long term chronic illness we develop certain skills, certain coping mechanisms, and even ways to keep the world away when we have to.  We develop the ability to create a mask to wear when we absolutely have to interact with the outside world. 

We live with chronic pain and fatigue, we're no longer in charge of our bodies, but acknowledging this to ourselves is difficult enough, much less sharing it with anyone else.  So, we craft a mask to wear.  A happy, smiley, all-is-well mask to hide behind that can usually fool (almost) everyone around us that we're fine. Nothing to see here, move along please.  Don't look too closely...   

It's exhausting though, wearing this mask.  It drains a lot of energy being "on" all the time.  

Maybe this awful virus can be a "reset" for all of us honeys?  Maybe we don't have to wear a mask anymore?  Maybe we can all just be who we are?  Maybe the world won't mind if we get tired or hurt too much to take part some days?  Maybe the world wouldn't judge us for being us after all? 

Maybe in the post corona world the human race will learn that everyone is needed. Everyone has thoughts, feelings, experiences, joys and sadness that all contribute to the wonderful world that we live in, and make that world what it is. Maybe, someday, we won't need to put on our masks at all anymore. Not the little fabric ones and especially not the ones nobody else can see. 

Till next time dear ones, stay warm and safe, hugs always xx

Choosing Your Battles - 3 Ways To Cope When Living With A Chronic Illness

Disclaimer: I don't mean this post to be taken as health advise. Please speak to your Doctor or Health Professional if you have any problems.  I just wanted to share some of the ways I've found to cope over my nearly 20 years or so of living with a chronic illness.

Hi Honeys
How are you today?  Very well I hope dear ones.  I've been a bit on the quiet side recently haven't I? For months actually.  I am sorry, I have so many posts, started and abandoned, sitting in the draft folder but arthritis and brain fog seem to be winning the battle, especially lately.  They haven't won the war yet though honeys and I'm not about to give up without a fight but recently even everyday things have seemed far more difficult to cope with.

Like all spoonies I've had to learn to prioritize.  To assign a level of importance to daily tasks, chores & activities.  Each day begins with so many things I'd like to get done but since I was long ago forced to realize I simply can't go writing cheques that the Bank of Body can't cash, I know there are limits. I know I have to choose carefully my battles for each day.

There are days when even having my morning shower, getting dressed and combing my hair feel like an achievement and then there are my (unfortunately far more rare recently) good days where I can be showered, dressed and started my morning load of laundry before pain slows me down for a while. Slows me long enough to have to re-group. Maybe to take my pain meds or to wait for the pain to ease enough to move on to another (gentle) task.

Every choice carries a cost honeys.  A morning of cleaning will almost certainly mean a difficult afternoon. It can be incredibly frustrating to have invisible walls appear blocking our plans for the day but this is where forward planning is everything.

Being a spoonie means being realistic about the limitations your chronic illness places on you.  It changes how we live, but that doesn't mean that we have to give up, admit defeat and resign ourselves to a future of sitting on the sofa all day.  We can't ever do that dear ones.  We can't let it win you see.

We still have to live.  We just have to live a little smarter than our non spoonie friends.  Planning is key.  Planning, with a dash of self-care included, is everything.  We have to learn to stop being so stubborn, so determined to beat the limitations set on us by our health that we end up sabotaging ourselves.

I have a feeling this post may require a beverage and maybe a cookie (or two) so I'll wait here while you go fetch a coffee and a few cookies....  See you back here in a min then 😃